I’m a Single Parent: Here’s My Monthly Budget
Written by
Jordan Rosenfeld
Edited by
Molly Sullivan
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They say that raising kids is expensive, but it’s even more so for single parents, and especially those who are sole caregivers of their kids.
A California woman who preferred to go by “Laura” instead of her real name, age 53, an office manager for a medical clinic, has had sole custody of her two children for the past six years. Her oldest child has been in college for three years, and her daughter is just about to start in the fall, but that hasn’t made her life much cheaper.
Here’s what Laura’s income and monthly budget look like.
Income and Cost of Living
She earns a salary of $75,000 per year and receives an additional $1,400 per month in child support from her ex-husband, (or $16,800 per year), which is about to come to an end when her youngest turns 18 in a few months. On top of that she hustles for an inconsistent $700-$800 per month in supplemental babysitting income (or about $8,400 per year), which has her working literally seven days a week. The impending loss of child support and an uncertainty to how much longer she can keep up the side hustle have her scrambling to figure out how to replace that income.
In California, while Laura meets the official definition of middle class, which ranges from $61,269 on the low end to $183,810 on the high end, California consistently ranks somewhere between the second and fourth most expensive state in the U.S. to live and that’s getting worse in a high-tariff environment.
Rent
Laura’s total rent is $3,350 per month, but she rents out a room for $1,000. This brings her rent payment down to $2,350 per month, but given how California housing prices are going, she said, “My housing situation isn’t going to get any cheaper. In fact, it could get more expensive.”
Health Insurance
She pays $156 per month health insurance for herself through Covered California as she makes too much money to qualify for Medi-Cal but her current policy is cheaper than the insurance her employer offered her. Her daughter is still on her father’s policy, most likely only until she turns 18, since he dropped their older child from his insurance when they turned 18.
Groceries and Dining Out
Before Laura’s older child went away to college, she spent around $1,000 per month in groceries. That dropped to $600 when her older child left, but now it’s back up to $800 “because groceries are so expensive” and because she prioritizes organic, gluten-free products.
Utilities, Gas and Car
Laura’s income allows her to qualify for a reduced rate with her local utility, lowering the cost of her gas and electric to around $100 per month and $30 per month for garbage services.
However, after driving her older car for years, she had to buckle down and buy a new one, adding a $430 car payment to her bills, as well. She also pays around $200 per month in gas to commute to her job. Her daughter has a job to pay for her own gas and car insurance, as does her older child, who lives out of state.
Extra Earnings and Savings
To have any wiggle room at all, Laura has taken to babysitting on evenings after work and weekends. “I work seven days a week,” she said.
Though she loves being with kids, she also finds it vastly more taxing at age 53 than she did when her children were little. While the $700 or so is a nice buffer now, it won’t replace the child support for her daughter when it stops in a few months.
In lieu of a traditional emergency fund, Laura relies upon her annual tax refund as a buffer, which can average up to $10,000, at least while she can still claim her two children as dependents. However, she also carries an average of $8,000 in credit card debt. She makes regular payments and often will put a big chunk down when her tax refund comes in, but she considers it a necessary part of survival for now.
Facing an Uncertain Future
Laura finds herself facing several possible scenarios for the future. While she expects a small raise at her job, she knows that it’s rare for someone in her position to earn more than she does now. She does have retirement income squared away, but it is modest.
She’s considering getting a special certification in lactation consulting, something she’s done in an unofficial capacity for 20 years, for which she could then bill around $250 per consultation. However, that requires $4,000 to pay for the program that she’s figuring out how to generate at the same time as she’s facing a $16,800 shortfall when child support ends. And supporting her young adult kids will not entirely go away even as her youngest heads to college. She currently sends money to her oldest and anticipates having to help her youngest out from time to time, as well.
In the worst-case scenario, she could move in to a small guest house on her parents’ property, which would mean relocating and leaving behind the community and job she loves.
Laura handles it by being practical but realistic. “I’m in one of those perfect scenarios where I don’t qualify for social services, and I don’t make enough money to really get by. I’m just kind of pretending that I am.”
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